<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=82 BGCOLOR="#006699" TEXT="#080000" background="210fd521erlcgo.jpg"> <bR> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=210 BGCOLOR="#FFCC66" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="20fd2993.jpg"> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" height=398 BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <I>Dumb Blonde Jokes</I></div> <div> <A HREF="id20.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Jokes"><U>Jokes</U></A></div> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> Dumb blonde jokes</div> <div>  <img src="HTMLobj-397/aniGif.gif" border="0" align="bottom" width="400" height="30">  </div> <bR> <div> <B>Even if we all don't agree...they are still ALWAYS funny</B></div> <bR> <div> She sent me a fax with a stamp on it. </div> <div> She thought a quarterback was a refund. </div> <div> She tripped over the cordless phone. </div> <div> She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. </div> <div> She told someone to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don't Walk". </div> <div> She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. </div> <div> At the bottom of the application where is says "Sign here", she wrote Sagittarius. </div> <div> If she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless. </div> <div> When she heard that 90% of all crimes were around the home, she moved. </div> <div> She got an AM radio. It took her 9 months to figure out that she could use it at night.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#000000" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> When she saw the sign in front of the YMCA, she said, "Look! They spelled Macy's wrong!". </div> <div> She stood staring at the frozen orange juice because it said "Concentrate".</div> <bR> <div> There is a brunette and 11 blondes hanging over the edge of a </div> <div> cliff off a piece of rope. They realize that the rope would </div> <div> break if one of them didn't let go and they would all fall to </div> <div> their deaths. The Brunette starts this big heartwarming speech </div> <div> about how she is going to sacrifice herself for the others. At </div> <div> the end of the speech the blondes all clap.</div> <bR> <div> There once was this blonde, and she was sitting at the table </div> <div> with her husband eating breakfast before he went to work. Out </div> <div> of the blue the blonde says,"Honey today while your at work I </div> <div> am goning to paint the house." The husband says "No, no dear </div> <div> don't paint the house because then when I come home from work I </div> <div> will just have to clean everything up, just please don't do </div> <div> it." So the husband went to work and when he came home the </div> <div> house smelled like paint. Then he went up to their bedroom, and </div> <div> he saw his wife laying on the floor with 2 coats on and </div> <div> sweating to death. He ran over to her and said, "Honey, honey </div> <div> what's wrong why on earth are you sweating to death?" She got </div> <div> up and grabed the paint cane, went over to her husband and </div> <div> said, "Well look at the can dummy, it says for best results put </div> <div> on 2 coats!"</div> <bR> <div> There were two blondes walking in the woods. As they were </div> <div> walking one of them noticed some tracks on the ground. One </div> <div> stops the other one and says "Look deer tracks." The other </div> <div> goes "Those are not deer tracks those are bear tracks." So </div> <div> they fight about what they are and are not, and the next day </div> <div> the paper head lines read "Two Blondes Killed By Train".</div> <bR> <div> How did the blonde burn her nose?</div> <bR> <div> Bobbing for French fries.</div> <bR> <div> Why won't they hire Blondes as pharmacists?</div> <bR> <div> They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.</div> <bR> <div> Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to </div> <div> a regular one?</div> <bR> <div> You have to hollow out the head.</div> <bR> <div> A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very </div> <div> nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I </div> <div> wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you </div> <div> take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to </div> <div> you!"</div> <bR> <div> A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The </div> <div> Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American </div> <div> said,"We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So </div> <div> what, we're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and </div> <div> the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You </div> <div> can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the </div> <div> Russian.. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you </div> <div> know. We're going at night!"</div> <bR> <div> A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are running from the cops, </div> <div> they hide on a potato farm. They crawl into some potato bags, </div> <div> the first cop pokes the bag with the brunette in it, she </div> <div> says "meow" the cop confirms that it is just a cat. The second </div> <div> cop pokes the bag with the redhead in it she says "woof". The </div> <div> cop says that it is just a dog. The third cop pokes the bag </div> <div> with the blonde in it she say in her sweetest voice "POTATO."</div> <bR> <div> Their are two blondes working at a company together. The rest </div> <div> are redheads and brunettes. One day a blonde came in and </div> <div> started yelling "I'm a light, I'm a light!" The boss went over </div> <div> to her and and told her that if she yelled that again she would </div> <div> get fired. So the next day the blonde came in yelling "I'm a </div> <div> light, I'm a light!" The boss went over too her and told her </div> <div> that she was fired. So she started to pack her bags and her </div> <div> other blonde friend was packing her bags too. The boss went </div> <div> over to her and said "Why are you packing your bags I fired </div> <div> your friend not you?" "I know", said the blonde "but how am I </div> <div> supposed to work without a light?"</div> <bR> <div> Q: Why do blondes have t-g-i-f on their shirts?</div> <div> A: It means this goes in front.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> How did the blonde explain how his helicopter crashed?</div> <div> He said it was getting cold, so he turned off the ceiling fan.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Why did the blonde quit his job as a restroom attendant?</div> <div> He couldn't figure out how to refill the hand dryer.</div> <bR> <div> What do you call blonde twins doing bubble gum commercials?</div> <div> Double-dumb.</div> <bR> <div> How can you tell if a blonde has been using your lawnmower?</div> <div> The green WELCOME mat is ripped all to shreds.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> What's the advantage of being married to a blonde?</div> <div> You can park in handicapped zones.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> What happened to the blonde tap dancer?</div> <div> She slipped off and fell down the drain.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Why did the blonde take his new scarf back to the store?</div> <div> It was too tight.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Why did it take the blonde a whole week to wash three basement windows?</div> <div> It took him six days just to dig the holes to put the ladder in.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Did you hear about the blonde who gave his cat a bath?</div> <div> He still hasn't gotten all the hair off his tongue.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> How does a psychic refer to a blonde?</div> <div> Light reading.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Did you hear about the blonde who thought he discovered that</div> <div> he had a twin brother?</div> <div> He didn't realize he was looking in a mirror.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> THATS IT FOR THIS WEEK!!! </div> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>